Attraction...

I have been on the fence about whether or not I should continue to post in this particular blog. It's mean, it's condescending, it's petty and it's ridiculous. It was meant to be a joke but when I review these entries, I see just how sad my dating life has been. And it's no one person's fault...it has made me question the type of person I am that ends up attracting these types of men. Boys. Whatever.

Part of me is ready to give up to it all, but in the last year or so, my biological clock has gone off...the alarm bells are ringing at high volume and I realize that my priorities have changed. In fact, many are surprised that I have opened up my heart and soul to the idea of having a second child. I would love that.

I refuse to go down that road again as a single mom, though. It's been difficult enough as it is with my daughter and my self...I cannot imagine trying to have a second one on my own. I really can't think of anything more awful. So no, instead I continue to put myself out there, in hopes of finding that special someone...that partner...who I can call lover and friend. I want to do this the "right way". (Which may be my fatal flaw... is there a "right" way?)

In doing so, I seem to have started attracting a new breed of men.

The recently wounded.

I have no idea how to handle this nor do I know how to make it stop. Men suffering from recent heartbreaking tragedy seem to gravitate towards me. They love to suck the love out of me...and then leave me. I'm not sure why this is happening but I would really like it to stop.

In 2013 alone, I have been a rebound girl for not one...not TWO...but THREE guys who have had their hearts ripped apart by women (who, in my opinion, really didn't know what they were missing). And no, I didn't sleep with them. I can blame their exes or whatever, but something in that set up didn't work for those couples. One of the common threads I found was that all three of these men were in these long term relationships (3+ years for all) and no one had proposed marriage! If I were lingering in a relationship that long and the question hadn't been popped, I'd get out too! Of course, how can I possibly know what goes on inside any of their relationships; there could be a whole number of factors that I don't understand and that's completely fine. I'm just saying that if after the first year or so you haven't decided if this is someone you'd like to get serious with, then get out. Save folks the heartbreak. And your own heartbreak...that can really only come down to your own indecisive behavior.

I blame the media, still. The idea of the man-child as an acceptable way for an adult male to behave is ridiculous and abhorrent. Why should women have to grow up and balance a) family b) relationships c) being feminine and sexy and physical attractive in a multitude of ways d) have a successful career and e) be delighted to take care of anyone who falls in their path. All this while men (from my vantage point only) a) have to have a job b)...*anyone else hear crickets*???

It's a double standard and I personally refuse to continue to partake. So in reflection, men, perhaps your broken hearts aren't due to the fact that your ex is a cold hearted bitched but instead, maybe you were existing in the very selfish form of man-child.

In other words, grow up.

Have a day, my loyal readers! XOXOXO